I sat in his office, sick that I was in the principal's office once again. How do I keep getting into these messes? Don't answer that. Sure I was the kid who would put tacks on a fellow students seat before he plopped down. And yes I was the girl who would sharpen my pencil 800 times. And maybe I was the girl who wrote the answers on her hand during tests...maybe. And maybe I would cut my friends hair during recess. But this time it wasn't my fault. It was another.
I was being asked the questions as to what transpired. Did I see her take the necklace off the rack? Did I see her with the stolen goods? My answer made me ill. I did in fact see my friend, who was the thief, with the items. I went to a christian school and a friend of mine was caught red handed with stolen jewelry. What were those items? Michel Jackson collectibles. This friend was so mesmerized and in love with him she was willing to break the law for his themed jewelry and clothing. Now here I am being questioned by our principal/pastor if I witnessed it. I feared this man. He never seemed too happy with me anyway. Other encounters were usually correcting me, trying to change me, warning me, and now I was required to be a snitch. To betray a friend is never easy. And to be put on the spot by somebody you fear rather than respect, made the situation even more difficult.
The reason this story comes back to my mind is for two reason: 1) This is the 1 year anniversary of Michael Jackson's death. And 2) I am reading A Tale of Three Kings, a study of brokenness, submission and authority.
That encounter with my school principal and other leaders who caused my heart to beat faster out of fear, has always inspired me to study what true leadership is and what God sees as genuine authority. I think a quote from the Tale of Three Kings summed it up for me.
I will tell you of my king and his greatness, My king has never threatened me as does yours. Your king has begun his reign with laws, rules, regulations and fear. The clearest memory I have of my king, when we lived in caves, is that his was a life of submission, not authority. He taught me not the quick cures of rules and laws, but the art of patience...My king spoke not of submitting to him. He feared no rebellion...because...because he did not mind if he was dethroned?"
This was being said from one of David's mighty men. This fictitious interview also quoted the warrior saying, " David had authority, but I don't think that fact ever occurred to him! We were 600 no-goods with a leader who cried a lot."
A weeping leader sounds a lot like a man of sorrow. Sometimes I beat myself up because I cry when my heart hurts or I'm afraid. I feel weak when I am scared, and then it occurs to me, as I am sure it is occurring to you now, That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:10
I remember when my dad got saved. I was nine years old and I saw him weeping at the altar with his hands raised. I left the pew and stood by him, I couldn't stop my tears. He reached his hand down to me and I took his weathered rough hand. I saw tears streaming down his face and my heart broke. And I never felt safer than when I saw my father weep.
